I’m going to take Thanksgiving Day off from the blog and maybe Friday too. I will be without access so that is the way it will go. I’m woefully behind getting ready so I will not be here long. To everyone I say: be thankful. Be kind. Be good, Show the love of Jesus to everyone you come across. Happy Thanksgiving!
So Disney World was fun, fun, fun. I only got furious one time and it was at my husband. WE were in MouseGear at Epcot and he insisted that it couldn’t be raining that hard and if it was, then it wouldn’t stop in time for us to get to our dinner reservations in the Japan area of the World Showcase. He was wrong on both counts, and I had told him so before we stepped foot out in it. So that part was not fun. The dance was also difficult in that it gave both kids blisters that hurt them for the res of he trip.
But otherwise it was great particularly our last day when we saw a STOMP-style group called The Jammitors dressed as park cleaners playing garbage cans as drums. I thought our middle child was going to go bonkers with joy. She got to play their set after their performance and talk with them. So that was fun also.
So we got back yesterday and have been doing laundry ever since. The oldest has checked on her job now that she’s home for good for the summer. They said they would call her if they could use her to sub for other teachers at the daycare. SO that was good news. WE go next weekend to Dance Teachers United for our last competition. So that is a good thing upcoming as well. WE’ll have about a month or so off from dance practice, etc. and we will enjoy that.
So all is good on multiple fronts so far this summer. WE will see how the rest of it goes.
We’re getting everything together to leave tomorrow morning for Disney World. ALl I really have to do is get some medicine filled before I go and make sure we have all our meds and other things. We bought most of our supplies and have our suitcases packed. The really big thing left is picking up the rental car at lunch–Bob and my oldest are taking care of that. I hate packing because I always feel like I’m going to forget something important. But I think we have it all together this time. The kids are washing the last of the dishes and we’re going to eat out the rest of the day :).
I’m really happy with how I am feeling thus far this summer. I’ve largely stayed awake during the days and I haven’t been using caffeine to do it–I’ve just been able to function better than usual. I’ve stayed up with my class and am accomplishing good things in it. I hate that Bob doesn’t feel comfortable with me leaving this fall and having to cancel that, but I understand his feelings. Maybe if I have a good spring I can sign up for the spring one. We will see.
Hope everyone enjoys their independence day!
So I finally gave up and went back into the hospital. I was feeling helpless, hopeless, and super angry at myself and everyone else. So that’s where I’ve been since Friday.
It actually went pretty well. I told them my tale of woe about the insurance company and my old medicine, so they simply put me back on it and said they would file the paperwork with my insurance company to see if they would cover the Abilify now that we could prove how sick I got without it. And Bob said even if the insurance company refused, we would just pay it out of pocket rather than me stay that sick. So once they put me on it, I really improved quickly and returned to rational thinking faintly soon. That was a good feeling.
So now I’m out and hopefully fully restored to rationality. Hopefully I can have another long run of stability now that I’m back on Ability.
THe pacing is getting more and more worrisome. I find myself just wandering around the house not accomplishing anything. I don’t know if I’m really having high energy or not. I’m just bored right now. I’m reading on my books for my course this fall, but for some reason at certain times of the day I just feel like I need to move around. I wonder what is causing all this.
But I’m tired at the same time. Sleepy is more the feeling. I don’t do a lot to get physically tired. But I just want to go to back to sleep. It’s very frustrating. I have things I need to do but I don’t feel like doing them. I just want to sleep or pace around. If I could get something done pacing, it would feel so bad.
I just want to feel normal again. I know that I’m really functioning on a higher level than I have been since I was diagnosed, but I want to feel like my old self again sometimes.
Packing and getting ready for vacation. Will probably be on hiatus while I’m gone, so feel free to wander through the archives while I’m gone. Hope everyone has s good week.
Going out of town this morning to celebrate Easter with my parents with a visit. I’ll also give my dad and sister their birthday gifts from when we couldn’t go in March. So today will be a fun day visiting with them. I’ll be back to regular blogging on Monday.
Well, I’ve been blogging right at five months now and have over 3,400 views I just established a Twitter account and a Facebook page and will be expanding on that in the months to come. The audience keeps growing; I have gained in visitors every month since October and have 33 WordPress followers so far.
I’ve completed the second draft of a manuscript of a book since working on the blog–I hope in another six months to be able to start looking for an agent after I have a solid track record with the blog. I’ve met some amazing people along the way–readers and commenters who are learning about bipolar disorder and those who are living with it as well. I thank each and every one of you for the support you’ve been giving me the past few months. I feel like I’ve finally found my audience and people to whom my writing means something. That is a great boon to a writer to know that someone is reading and cares about what you put out.
As far as my condition goes, I seem to be stabilizing a bit from earlier in the year. The obsessions have all but disappeared. I go back to my counselor in April and will get her take on how I’m holding up. I still have some challenges to work through–the end of the school year is always crowded with events and places to be and things to do. I’m going on a two-day blog hiatus starting tomorrow since I’ll be on a field trip with my youngest daughter to Chattanooga, Tennessee. That is a milestone in itself–I once thought I couldn’t travel without Bob because I was scared of being away from home and having an episode. But I see this trip as another step in my recovery. So wish me well on this trip and I’ll be back Friday!
